January is Balls

Three weeks?! That's too long. Not that anyone is hanging on my every word, but any writer worth his/her salt really needs to keep at this thing. If you didn't water your plants for three weeks, they would die. If you didn't have sex with your girlfriend for three weeks, she'd nail the pool boy. These are SERIOUS ISSUES, and also why I don't have plants.

I started this thing cuz there were a lot of movies around, and this being January (for another day anyway), there aren't many around at present. January movies always suck. Always. I don't know why everyone else hasn't picked up on this. If it were a GOOD movie, the studio would release it during March, or June, or if it's a drama, November/December during awards season. I never consciously noticed this until the mid-00's, when studios dumped two Uwe Boll "movies," two Januarys in a row, but it's been going on forever. Remember "Leprechaun?" Sure you don't. 1993. Jennifer Aniston. And a Leprechaun. Total shit (watch it at your next Bad Movie Night). Saw it in January of '93. The tradition continues to this day. (the movie thing. not the me-seeing-them-thing).

I was inspired by a friend of mine to start a second blog; Ironically, she went and deleted all her shit last week. I suspect she'll be back (she deletes her Facebook account every couple of months), but the point is: We're all interested in more than one thing. Said Friend was blogging life, photography, and a bit of modeling (all my friends are hot), I think if I only blogged movies and TV all the time, I'd look like a fat shut-in. And while I HAVE ballooned up to 135 lbs., I'm gonna try other shit on the side.

Eventually. I was gonna see about sports, but the Super Bowl is in a week and then there's nothing interesting on ESPN until March... and then not again until late August. I mean, I dig baseball and all, but... there's 162 games in a season. The first 80 or so I can take or leave.

Also I hit up the Seattle Sci-Fi Short Film Festival this past weekend (#ssff). I don't see enough short films. Neither do you. As yet another friend said, "They are PERFECT for my attention span!"

Back in February with another tirade. No really.

...

.... February Leprechaun. That's a lot of oddly-placed R's. Or a tongue twister. Or an awful band.

Autumn Dilemma

NOT GEEK
DUDE. It's football season.

GEEK
Football sucks. Play some video games. Read a book.

NOT GEEK
FUCK YOU. This is the year North Texas goes 0-12. Plus you can go right down the street and watch the Huskies lose to real teams.

GEEK
TELEVISON. MOVIES. INTERNET. LATE NIGHT JAPANESE ANIMATION. COMIC BOOKS.

NOT GEEK
CAR CHASES. FOOTBALL. HIGH-SPEED-COLLISIONS. VIOLENCE. DEFEATING THE ENEMY. BEEEEEEEEEEER.

GEEK
I'll shoot zombies, that's good enough for me.

NOT GEEK
Football is made into multiple video games EVERY YEAR. It's a mainstay on every console. Geeks should embrace the F$#CK out of that.

GEEK
Those games are entirely too complicated. If I wanted to actually play football, I could just swing my arm instead of angling the perfect nanosecond timing on an XBY-cross-arm bootleg R-button combo.

NOT GEEK
OH HO, so you admit you'd play football in real life.

GEEK
My last date was the same day your last date was, pal.

NOT GEEK
Now we're getting personal.

GEEK
We do both enjoy beer.

NOT GEEK
And boobies!

GEEK
And winning.

NOT GEEK
Agree to disagree?

GEEK
Boise State

NOT GEEK
Any team from the Big 12 that's not OU.

GEEK
YOU'RE DEAD TO ME.

NOT GEEK
You go play video games. See that hottie at the end of the bar? I'm-a slap her ass and ask her if she has any Texan in her.

GEEK
Then we can both nurse the black eye.... together...... playing...

NOT GEEK
..... video games.

AND.... SCENE.



not geek
north texas!!